For All Who Have Loved....

I am currently sitting in the Denver airport with my brother Andrew killing time (also known as playing on our laptops- well, I'm playing, I think he is actually being productive) until our flight leaves to bring us home to Phoenix.  We are on the downside of a whirlwind trip to Leadville, Colorado- a rather unscheduled and unplanned trip to our 'unofficial' hometown to attend our aunt's funeral.  My Aunt Martie passed away earlier this week after a massive heart attack (there will be more about this soon... we all need to be so much more aware of how heart attacks present differently in women than in men).  Words just can not capture the emotions that have flowed through our family during the past few weeks....

I've tried and tried to write something here that feels right- that captures who Martie was to me, to my mom, to her children and to her grandchildren, but I can't find the right words.  She was only 54 years old.  And that is just not old enough.  Period.  She wasn't done here on Earth- she wasn't done being a mom, a grandma, a sister or a friend.  And to think of her kids living the rest of their lives without their mom... to think of her grandchildren growing up without her being part of their lives- it is incomprehensible.   (And truthfully, I think this is where it really eats at me... to think of Julia and Colin losing either their Nana or their Grandma at this point.in their lives.. I can't even fathom it).  I know there is a method to this madness- that there is a reason for all that happens in this world- but I am really seeking to understand those reasons right now.  I know that the impact of Martie's passing will ripple through our family for years to come- she will be missed by so many. 

My heart breaks for Nick and Emily (her children)  and for my mom and dad.  For all who knew and loved her, who held her dear, who laughed and cried and yelled and smiled with her. For all whose lives she touched (and that number is many).  Martie.. You will be missed.

So, with that I will end.  Not a lot of words, but words that mean a whole lot. 
Night all-
C

P.S.  I really can't end this post without saying how much I love and appreciate my brother (who flew on this trip so that I could travel despite my ongoing health issues), my mom and dad (who had to drive the pass TWICE at night and through ice to come to the airport to pick us up AND who had to listen to my craziness for the last few days), my friend Karen (who despite some reservations, took me to get an epidural under general anesthesia AND then put me on an airplane just 3 hours later), my mother-in-law Paulette (who took over Julia and Colin care when neither Joe or I could be there), my friends (who have prayed and listened and just been my friends during the past month) and finally, Mr. Furedy (who just as always is there for me- always, always, always in every possible way).  I am so very blessed.  Very very blessed.